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Miss World
Why are we not more concerned about the new Miss Guyana/World Odessa Phillips? It appears from recent photos that her tiara has been surgically implanted into her scalp and will remain there until she arrives in Nigeria. How awkward it must be, having to sleep in this strange ornament; to sit at the breakfast table in a nightgown wearing it; to wash one's hair. What does the Queen actually talk about when she makes her courtesy calls? Oh to be a fly on the wall during the penetrating conversation with the President.
One can imagine Jagdeo nervously pushing up his spectacles as Phillips grills him on the stalled consultations with the opposition. In fact what better symbol than to have Miss Guyana/World as the nation's peace broker? First item on the agenda: Lipstick for deprived mothers.
Meanwhile the controversy still rages over her victory. Did she really ask Ron Robinson to repeat the question? Heaven forbid!
Despite severe admonitions from this column, people really have written to the newspapers encouraging the nation to rally around her! What this entails one cannot be sure. How does one rally around a beauty queen? Of course these things are not to be laughed at. Which elitist dares to snort at the efforts of the "young Vergeneogen beauty"? Neither should we be amused by the threatened boycott of the pageant being held in Nigeria, something the Moslems of that country would love more than anything else.
Of course the contestants are missing the point. Receiving a bikini wax and having to keep smiling for two weeks is truly more abusive than being stoned to death, something which sounds like a quite romantic way to go.
Miss Guyana could earn much more than her ten seconds of fame by donning a Golden Arrowhead burka as her national garment in "protest at abused Moslem women worldwide."
GINA press release
The sitting of Parliament scheduled for tomorrow will now be held next Monday, according to a GINA press release. The release said this message was conveyed by two men standing in front of the Stabroek Market on Tuesday afternoon. A boy selling oranges overheard them and told a customer who went home and told her father who mentioned this to his neighbour who called his cousin who works as a cleaning lady at GINA who told a worker who wrote this story.